You Can Watch Only So Many “Golden Girls” Episodes

Is anyone with the semi-usual 9-to-5 schedule aware of The Hallmark Channel and the WE Network’s slightly obsessive preoccupation with episodes of “The Golden Girls”? Is there nothing else for these two cable networks to broadcast? Who is running the show at these stations? Or is it just a clever marketing ploy aimed at the target audiences of the daytime life of nursing homes across America?

Here I am two days post surgical intervention, waddling around in that recovery phase that sounds nicer to the ear than it actually is to the body. In my muddled brain of pain medicated bliss, I find moments of lucidity when I realize that I have watched countless episodes of this iconic 1980s television gem nonstop. In between seeking comfort in sitting, or standing I notice that all I hear are the voices of the fearless female foursome of that golden time in TV. Sure, there is pain and recovery to deal with, but there is also mind-numbing television. Granted, most of the time I can’t really recall when one episode has slipped effortlessly into the next, but still…someone help me come up for air!

As I stumble from bedroom to living room, where another TV awaits me, I find that I am drawn, as if by a need to laugh when I know it will hurt to do so, to watch daytime comedies, including the always hilarious “I Love Lucy”. Oh, cruel fate! That you would make daytime TV funny for those of us trying to keep from cracking up and, possibly, busting a stitch! I suspected daytime television was its own beast and I was right. It lures you in with its toxic mix, riddled with the repetitive and the redundant. It keeps you planted, by force of condition or circumstance, to your place in front of its mighty draw.

The Hallmark Channel ambushes you with the fun-loving good times of Miami’s golden foursome, Dorothy, Sophia, Rose and Blanche and the wholesome goody-two-shoes of Laura Ingalls and her “laugh-through-the-hard-times” life on the prairie. TV Land tries to keep pace running oldies, but goodies like “All in the Family,” but fails miserably mid afternoon with its ruthless ongoing episodes of “Gunsmoke” and “Bonanza”. Switch over to the WE network and, as if by conspiratorial agreement, you’ll rediscover the “Golden Girls” all over again. “Hey, didn’t I just see this episode?” It is enough to drive someone – who is at the present time having trouble reaching for the remote – completely mad!

Don’t get me wrong, I am as much a fan of writer Mark Cherry’s work on this old show as I am on his current female-empowerment trip, “Desperate Housewives”. However, I am starting to worry that excessive amounts of post-menopausal television viewing will somehow make me, well, menopausal. Plus, I am concerned that I will be less able to tolerate what passes for television today (i.e. reality TV).

It amazes me that the TV-on-DVD industry is able to make any money at all, what with the constant feeding of the shows on regular cable. But who am I to talk? I asked for (and received) from my husband, the “I Love Lucy” Complete Series Box Set. Even though at any given time on any number of cable channels you can catch Lucy, Ricky, Fred and Ethel venturing out on one of their crazy escapades.

But back to “The Golden Girls”… what a really bright, forward-thinking show this was in its prime. Having these fashionable grandmas discussing, with a hint of humor, everything from a libido in constant overdrive, to Dorothy’s lesbian friend, to teen pregnancy, to immigration, to Sophia’s Sicilian curses, to failed marriages and divorce, to love in the twilight years, to Rose’s heart attack, to Blanche’s Big Daddy and his…southern indiscretion with a black woman in his employ. No topic was too taboo, no subject too appalling for these ladies to tackle and conquer! I know, the show sounds like a riot! Yet, it was and continues to be...still hilarious, still relevant and still worth a watch.

Perhaps the resurgence of interest in the show has to do with the recent loss of two of the golden ladies, Estelle Getty (Sophia) and Bea Arthur (Dorothy), but it doesn't mean that I am not enjoying the ride down memory lane with them.

Onward...I write this still enduring some post-surgical pain, still taking some happy pills and still not climbing the walls from boredom. In a week’s time, or two, will these daytime jewels of television still hold my interest? Will I be fed up, or worse, repeating, verbatim, every episode? Well, I guess I will have to wait and see (or is it wait and watch) television constantly, to get a proper assessment?