Keeping Secrets
If you have ever heard the question, “Can you keep a secret?” then you are fully aware of how titillating a statement it really is. There was even a book by Sophie Kinsella titled, “Can You Keep a Secret?” It is such an intriguing concept, this secret-keeping habit, that someone wrote a book about it! You know that when someone asks you to keep a secret, the first thing that pops into your head is sex. Come on! Admit it! You think that the person is about to divulge some sort of secret sexual escapade they engaged in that could potentially damage friendships or relationships. Seldom is the secret that good, though. Let’s face it. We people prefer to keep secret the things that we are not very proud of. Human nature is what I call that!
A more likely scenario is that the secret about to be shared involves some gossip about somebody else’s sex life, marriage, kids, jobs, and such. Still titillating, but not nearly as exciting as if you were listening to the actual person share deep, dark details of her own life. Again, we are creatures of secrets we would rather not be so open about.
"A secret is not a secret if more than one person knows it!"
I am not sure I can remember where I heard the statement above, but when I did, all I thought was: “Wow! That’s deep!” It is deep and it is so true. Seriously, if you have something secret that only you know, the second you spill it to even one, close, trusted friend, or relative, you have made of that secret public information.
Over the years I have encountered many instances in which I found myself in a pickle, as they say, for not keeping a secret, or worse, purposely telling one. I am so over those times, though. I learned the hard way that sometimes when you think it is harmless sharing among friends; it really ends up hurting someone you care about.
In time, I learned the art of keeping secrets so close to my heart that I became almost like a bartender, listening to secrets that were funny, sad and downright scary. Some days I wanted to tell the teller: “Please! Too much information!” Like the time a former coworker told me her husband was impotent, or when another knew ahead of time he was being fired, so he quit at the start of a highly treasured company project without training a replacement. Yes, these fall under the TMI category. However, I understood (and still do) well the urgency of some folks to get something off their chest or vent or scream (if need be), to someone – anyone - just to be at peace somehow.
Sometimes secrets are a necessary evil. They buy you time, when you still haven’t sorted things out in your mind. They give you space, when there are still some things that you need to make clear to yourself. They allow you privacy to keep things quiet, so you make sense of it enough to tell someone else. Sometimes they even give you the giggles because they let you be in a crowded room with people who don’t know what you’re secret is and that is somehow funny.
I have a secret.
Of course, by my own definition of one and not by the standard of “no one but me knows about it”. However, I fully intend to share my secret in due time and with all the correct ingredients to receive the best possible outcome. Until then, I’ll just be over here, giggling, in a room full of people.
A more likely scenario is that the secret about to be shared involves some gossip about somebody else’s sex life, marriage, kids, jobs, and such. Still titillating, but not nearly as exciting as if you were listening to the actual person share deep, dark details of her own life. Again, we are creatures of secrets we would rather not be so open about.
"A secret is not a secret if more than one person knows it!"
I am not sure I can remember where I heard the statement above, but when I did, all I thought was: “Wow! That’s deep!” It is deep and it is so true. Seriously, if you have something secret that only you know, the second you spill it to even one, close, trusted friend, or relative, you have made of that secret public information.
Over the years I have encountered many instances in which I found myself in a pickle, as they say, for not keeping a secret, or worse, purposely telling one. I am so over those times, though. I learned the hard way that sometimes when you think it is harmless sharing among friends; it really ends up hurting someone you care about.
In time, I learned the art of keeping secrets so close to my heart that I became almost like a bartender, listening to secrets that were funny, sad and downright scary. Some days I wanted to tell the teller: “Please! Too much information!” Like the time a former coworker told me her husband was impotent, or when another knew ahead of time he was being fired, so he quit at the start of a highly treasured company project without training a replacement. Yes, these fall under the TMI category. However, I understood (and still do) well the urgency of some folks to get something off their chest or vent or scream (if need be), to someone – anyone - just to be at peace somehow.
Sometimes secrets are a necessary evil. They buy you time, when you still haven’t sorted things out in your mind. They give you space, when there are still some things that you need to make clear to yourself. They allow you privacy to keep things quiet, so you make sense of it enough to tell someone else. Sometimes they even give you the giggles because they let you be in a crowded room with people who don’t know what you’re secret is and that is somehow funny.
I have a secret.
Of course, by my own definition of one and not by the standard of “no one but me knows about it”. However, I fully intend to share my secret in due time and with all the correct ingredients to receive the best possible outcome. Until then, I’ll just be over here, giggling, in a room full of people.
Comments
Well since you're giggling, I'll assume it's a good secret and try to wait patiently for the big reveal. :-)